By far, my worst type of home is the 2000's cookie cutter McMansion with its "open floor plans". God I hate being in the dining room and being able to wave to someone across the kitchen to the living room. There's no privacy. Worst of all, everything is the same; eventually the featureless drywall and the stark uniformity would drive me crazy. No thanks.
I live in a house that's over a hundred years old and I love its character and layout. It's near downtown and in a centuries old neighborhood with lots of big trees.... far, far from those gated communities with rustic names like "Deer Creek", "Willow Brook" and "River Chase". What is this, the fucking Shire?
I guess what it all boils down to is "character", of which the McMansions have none. Every one I've ever been in (which is many) all have the same criteria without exception:
- granite counter tops
- stainless steel appliances
- a garden tub with a separate shower
- hardwood floors
- open floor plan
- large master bedroom
- a walk in closet the size of a bedroom
- vaulted ceilings
- gourmet kitchen with island
- double sink in the master bath
And this is what ultimately attracts me to the 70s home. Both the decor and the layout of these homes had flair. Say what you want about their sense of style back then, but you have to admit they were at least interesting. Even old ranch houses could have pizzazz back in the seventies.
So let's take a look at some homes from the days before garden tubs and granite counter tops, shall we?
The color brown certainly got a lot of attention in the seventies. I dig the cool fireplace and that massive lamp.
I don't mind monochrome minimalism when it's groovy like this.
I love big ass couches. This is no McMansion, this pure seventies fab. A perfect place for the tots to play and dad to brood.
In case you didn't know, ferns were ubiquitous in the seventies. Possibly the hardest houseplant to keep alive, the fern found its way into homes throughout the decade.... often hanging from handmade macramé.
Hell, yeah. This has got the Moonbase Alpha vibe down pat. I can promise you this home isn't located in Shady Glen or Morningwood Estates.
The furniture isn't exactly comfortable looking, but for some reason I'm diggin' it.
Books were a lot more common as a part of a living room's decor back then. I'm often amazed at homes which don't seem to have a single bookshelf.
Ye gods! Where's the bigass flat screen?
Ahhhh. There's something about a sunken living room. Of course, I could live without the gargantuan alien viruses floating overhead.
Cheese and rice! WTF? It's a lamp, but it's also a monstrous plant phallus from Pink Floyd's The Wall.
What this room says to me: "Come. Eat some fondue. Smoke some grass. Relax."
I guess that's a sitar by the massive stockpile of dilithium crystals?
Now this is one kick ass Monday Friday den. The orange toadstool ashtray certainly stands out. This is back before smoking was a crime against humanity.
Can you imagine heating and cooling this open space? If you look close you can almost see the dollar bills being sucked into oblivion.
Nice. But it almost seems like there needs to be microphone hanging from the ceiling. I'd always be wondering when Merv Griffin was going to pop in.