10/7/11

The Boob Tube #26: The Landers Sisters


Audrey or Judy Landers were everywhere you looked in the seventies and eighties.... from game shows to The A-Team, these girls were busy back then.  One minute they're on the Dukes of Hazzard, the next they're belting out "You Thrill Me" on the radio, the next they're on the big screen in Stewardess School and VHS in Dr Alien. You get my drift - they were ubiquitous queens of all media.  I didn't know which was Audrey and which was Judy back then, and quite frankly - did it really matter?

Hint: Judy is the smoking hot one and Audrey is the super sexy one.

This was the classic case of being too sexy and flaunting it to the point where no one took their acting seriously.  Audrey, for instance, finished high school two years early and was a graduate of Julliard. Yet despite a potential to demonstrate serious acting abilities, never got much respect.

It didn't help matters that Judy spent several seasons on Madame's Place doing nothing but bouncing around displaying her ample cleavage - not exactly the best way to land a dramatic role alongside Meryl Streep. Her entire wardrobe on that show for 51 episodes could most likely fit in your shirt pocket.

So, Judy married a rich major league baseball pitcher and Audrey married a rich businessman and both faded back into obscurity.... but you can't keep this level of hotness hidden for long. It's time to bring Judy and her big sis, Audrey, back to center stage.

I did a little research and was surprised to find the amount of screen time these sisters experienced during their heyday.  I mean, I knew it seemed like they were everywhere.... but daaaaammn - they really were on every channel, every night, all night long. Not that anyone was complaining about "over exposure" when it came to these two ladies, but holy shit get a load of their resume below!

I did something that no one's every wasted time on before: compiling every TV appearance in chronological order.  Unlike IMDb, this goes night by night and covers both Landers girls.  Judy is in blue type, Audrey is white, and the text is orange when they both appear together.  Read it and understand the almighty power of The Landers Sisters! (Note: I've even included a few video clip downloads for Total Landers Immersion).



"MacGyver" Two Times Trouble (11 December 1989) 
"Midnight Caller" Blame It on Midnight (1 January 1989) 
"You Are the Jury" The State of Oregon vs. Stanley Manning (26 May 1987) 
"Night Court" Danny Got His Gun: Part 1 (12 May 1988)
"Super Password" (11 January 1988 - 15 January 1988)
"Super Password" (17 August 1987 - 21 August 1987)
"The Love Boat" Who Killed Maxwell Thorn? (27 February 1987)
"ALF" Try to Remember: Part 1 (9 February 1987) 
"ALF" Try to Remember: Part 2 (9 February 1987) 
"Murder, She Wrote" Night of the Headless Horseman (4 January 1987) 
"The New Hollywood Squares" (8 December 1986 - 12 December 1986) 
"L.A. Law" The House of the Rising Flan (10 October 1986)
"L.A. Law" The Princess and the Wiener King (17 October 1986)
"The $25,000 Pyramid" (11 August 1986 - 19 December 1986)
"Super Password" (14 July 1986 - 18 July 1986)
"Murder, She Wrote" If a Body Meet a Body (9 March 1986) 
"Crazy Like a Fox" The Fox Who Saw Too Much (12 February 1986) 
"Night Court" The Apartment (30 January 1986)
"Hotel" Shadows of Doubt: Part 1 (8 January 1986)
"New Love, American Style" Love and Marriage Test (7 January 1986)
"The Love Boat" German Cruise: The Villa/The Racer's Edge/Love or Money/The Accident (2 November 1985)


"The A-Team" Where Is the Monster When You Need Him? (1 October 1985)
"Comedy Factory" Four in Love (18 July 1985) 
"The Love Boat" Judy Hits a Low Note (23 March 1985)


"Knight Rider" Knight Strike (5 April 1985) 
"The Dukes of Hazzard" No More Mr. Nice Guy (19 October 1984)
"Match Game/Hollywood Squares Hour" (16 July 1984 - 20 July 1984)
"Body Language" (18 June 1984- 22 June 1984)
"Fantasy Island"Bojangles and the Dancer/Deuces Are Wild (12 May 1984) 
"Match Game/Hollywood Squares Hour" (2 - 20 April 1984)
"Lottery!" Chicago: Another Chance (1 March 1984) 
"The Love Boat" Ace's Valet/Mother Comes First/Hit or Miss America (25 February 1984)
"Night Court" The Former Harry Stone (18 January 1984) 
"Match Game/Hollywood Squares Hour" (19 - 23 December 1983)


"The Hitchhiker" Split Decision (14 December 1983)
"Fantasy Island"Saturday's Child/The Fantasy Island Girl (10 December 1983)
"Match Game/Hollywood Squares Hour"  (28 November 1983 - 2 December 1983)
"Match Game/Hollywood Squares Hour" (24 October 1983 -28 October 1983)
"The $25,000 Pyramid" (19 September 1983 - 18 November 1983)
"The $25,000 Pyramid" (13 June 1983 - 17 June 1983)
"The Love Boat" The Maid Cleans Up (12 March 1983)
"Fantasy Island"The Tallowed Image/Room and Bard (29 January 1983)


"Bob Hope's All Star Super Bowl Party" (29 January 1983)
"Tattletales" (11 January 1983 - 17 January 1983)
"Knight Rider" Forget Me Not (17 December 1982)
"The $25,000 Pyramid" (18 October 1982 - 18 February 1983)


"Madame's Place" (51 episodes -  20 September 1982 - 29 November 1982) 
"The Love Boat" Mothers Don't Do That/Marrying for Money/Substitute Lover (15 May 1982) 


"The Fall Guy" Three for the Road (14 April 1982)
"Password Plus" (19 March 1982 - 26 March 1982) 


"The Love Boat" His Girls Friday (13 February 1982)
"Fantasy Island" Cyrano/The Magician (24 October 1981)
"Fantasy Island" Devil and Mr. Roarke/Ziegfeld Girls/Kid Corey Rides Again (17 October 1981)
"Hee Haw" Episode #13.4 (3 October 1981)
"Aloha Paradise" Sydney's First Love/The Swingers/The King of Gardens (11 March 1981)
"Password Plus" (13 February 1981 - 23 November 1981)
"B.J. and the Bear" (15 episodes - 13 January 1981 - 9 May 1981)
"Dallas" (84 episodes - 16 January 1981 - 22 September 1989)
"CHiPs" The Great 5K Star Race and Boulder Wrap Party: Part 2 (7 December 1980)
"Password Plus" (36 episodes -18 November 1980 - 24 November 1980)  


"Buck Rogers in the 25th Century" Space Rockers (21 February 1980) 
"Fantasy Island" The Swinger/Terrors of the Mind (9 February 1980) 
"The Hollywood Squares" (5 May 1980) 




"The Dukes of Hazzard" R.I.P. Henry Flatt (14 March 1980)
"Young Maverick" Hearts O' Gold (12 December 1979)
"The Love Boat" Stimulation of Stephanie (1 December 1979) 


"Fantasy Island" Tattoo's Romance/Handy Man (10 November 1979)
"The Hollywood Squares" (29 October 1979)
"B.J. and the Bear" Cain's Son-in-Law (27 October 1979) 


"Charlie's Angels" Love Boat Angels (12 September 1979) 
"The Runaways" Dark Side of the Road (29 May 1979)
"The Hollywood Squares" (21 May 1979)
"Charlie's Angels" Teen Angels (28 February 1979)
"The Hollywood Squares" (26 February 1979) 




"The Jeffersons" The Other Woman (21 February 1979) 
"Match Game 79" - (9 January 1979 - 15 January 1979) 
"Highcliffe Manor" (5 episodes - 1 January 1979 - 3 May 1979)
"Battlestar Galactica" The Young Lords (19 November 1978)
"The Hollywood Squares" (13 November 1978)
"Match Game 78" (8 November 1978) 
"The Waverly Wonders" Rafkin's Victory Dance (6 October 1978)


"The Love Boat" Oh, My Aching Brother/ The Man Who Loved Women  (30 September 1978) 
"Match Game 78" (17 August 1978) 
"ABC Saturday Comedy Special" Archie (15 July 1978)
"Charlie's Angels" Angels on the Run (3 May 1978) 


"Vega$" (14 episodes - 25 April 1978 - 8 February 1979) DOWNLOAD CLIP
"What Really Happened to the Class of '65?" Class Dreamers (22 December 1977) 
"Happy Days"  Requiem for a Malph (6 December 1977)
"Police Woman" Screams (6 December 1977)
"Happy Days" Bye Bye Blackball (29 November 1977) 
"Emergency!" Computer Error (22 December 1973)
"The F.B.I." The Killing Truth (9 December 1973)
"Marcus Welby, M.D." The Light at the Threshold (9 October 1973)
"Room 222" To Go with the Bubbles (9 March 1973)



(Note: this list does not include any TV appearances past 1989; and it doesn't include their many appearances on Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous - which, for some bizarre reason, is not adequately listed on the usually-comprehensive IMDb)

18 comments:

  1. That sound you hear is me gasping... I just saw my entire puberty flash before my eyes! :)

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  2. Yikes! Two of the reasons I watched TV in my youth, right there....

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  3. Yowza! I've rarely been as excited upon seeing the title of one of your posts as I was today! 1973 to 1989, they really did cover the 70s and 80s. Man I love these ladies. I addition to the TV stuff was the modeling. I've got pictures of one of them with a chopped '50 Mercury and some other cars somewhere.

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  4. I forgot to say it's worth another dollar for the effort in giving the wonderful timeline.

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  5. I agree with Retro Hound--now that I'm home from work, I got to read this in earnest & it's damn impressive. Can't...stop...staring...at...pink satin...Vegas...pic!

    Thanks for the good work here, Gilligan :)

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  6. Quite a resume for them both! I remember seeing them often as a kid. Just an essential part of the 80s!

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  7. While living in London I used to work with a man who wrote screenplays for hollywood in the early eighties, he actually dated one of the sisters for a time. During one recount he told us about how she came to hollywood but was soon faced with the realization that what Hollywood wanted wasn't what she originally offered, but only her (ahem), assets. It is easy in retrospect to see why they moved on...

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  8. Whatever I have to do, whatever it takes, no matter how long I've got left on this rock, I have ABSOLUTELY got to see that episode of Fantasy Island "Tattoo's Romance." I can't even begin to contemplate how awesome that sounds.

    Gilligan - you SOB.

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  9. Here is another generation of the "sisters"

    http://www.indieezine.com/content/view/1517/77/

    ENS

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  10. God Bless You, Gilligan. I KNEW you wouldn't let us down.;-)

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  11. Oh yes...Audrey is the short one; Judy is tall.

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  12. Great entry G! Now we need a feature on a other set of sisters that was burned into my memory, the Mandrell sisters.

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  13. Thank you for the lesson on the Landers Sisters. Until now, it didn't click with me that there were two of them--sisters. I thought it was just one very, very active actress. Of course, not being a guy, I wasn't on the lookout for gorgeous women...I was more interested in Tom Selleck (still am, for that matter...) *grin*

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  14. That "Tattoos Romance" pic is priceless!

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  15. I remember a space comedy at the end of the 70's that I know had at least Judy Landers. They were on a "Garbage" freighter in space, it ahd a handsome csaptain and I thinkm it had a laugh track too... Does anybody remember this brief series?

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    1. I think you mean Quark - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0077066/

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  16. The problem with the Landers sisters was that they never showed us the goods. Some bitch that it's classy they didn't, but fuck them, we want to see those bare tits and bush. There was a rumor of natural blonde but I suspect a black muffin was between them legs, and also pink puffies on those tits...

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  17. I fell in love with a different Landers sister every week. Even though I had a steady girlfriend through the 70's and 80's they still got me through those early pubescent years...

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