Nice job! The first one (Conan) had me cracking up. I sent it out to a friend of mine who repeats that quote at least once a week.
I'm pretty sure the Conan line rips off Stalin's dictum: "The greatest delight is to mark one's enemy, prepare everything, avenge oneself thoroughly, and then go to sleep."
That was fantastic... Now I'm imagining lines from Withnail and I, as re-worked by Krazy Kat and Ignatz Mouse :)
Excellent! Thank you.