Album Covers #26: Cheesecake in lieu of Artist

Newsflash: That's not Carl Dobkins, Jr. on the cover.  In fact, I'll wager Mr. Dobkins has never even met the girl. Bottom line: the record company had to choose between Dobkins and cleavage for his cover.... and, well, they went with cleavage. You see, unless you were a pop sensation like Elvis or The Beatles you might want to consider sticking some cheesecake on your LP cover rather than your own unrecognizable mug.

Don't get me wrong, Carl Dobkins, Jr. was a dapper looking gentleman, and he did appear on some covers. However, artists who didn't have face recognition (generally the EZ Listening variety) more often than not went with cheesecake in lieu of a personal portrait.  For instance, Ray Connif put out a motherload of LPs, and I swear all of them had an anonymous chick on the cover.... I have no idea what Ray looks like and I own ten of his records.

After all, sometimes it just made damn good sense.  Take for instance the record above: what were they supposed to do - put a picture of a cello on the cover? Instead, they got a stoned hippie to unbutton her shirt. Well done.

The ultimate funk cheesecake is undoubtedly the Ohio Players Honey LP; however, Sun's 1978 album ain't too shabby.  Sun has the distinction of having my favorite song titles: "Slamm Dunk the Ffunk".

You got to give ole Louis Corchia credit - it takes guts to try and make the accordion sexy.  She looks really uncomfortable using it as a headrest, though.  Someone get this gal a pillow!

The Hammond Organ was notorious for its cheesecake album covers.  Let's face it, no one wants to see some dude straddling a Hammond.  What do people want to see? Harry Stoneham's answer: a topless chick.

Ye Gods! Even marching band music isn't spared the cheesecake treatment!  This band is composed of a dame wearing basically a Playboy bunny outfit.  And how about that baton girl? Look at her big beautiful epaulets!

Okay, I get it.  Not need to put Tony Mottola on the cover - it's far more sensible to use a busty broad instead.  But why does she have to wear Mickey Mouse gloves?

Never you mind that Mongo Santamaria is a legendary musician, an icon in the Afro-Cuban music scene.... .let's get a girl to shake dat ass and put it on his record cover.  After all, isn't the Fourth Law of Thermodynamics "Booty = $$$"?....... No? I'll see myself out.

It's covers like this that give cheesecake a bad reputation.  Rather than try and come up with something creative, original or artistic, we toss all imagination to the curb in favor of a naked chick with an umbrella.  Far be it from me to complain about nudity, but it just seems like it was not only used in lieu of the artist, it was also used in lieu of creativity.

Once that zebra roamed proudly upon the African plains.... only to wind up as a rug on a Hammond Organ record.  Funny how things turn out.

Percy Faith is the godfather of Easy Listening music.  This album came out in 1971 and said to the world, "You think Herb Alpert is the king of cheesecake covers? Herb Alpert can kiss my Canadian ass!"

Charlie was a four man group, none named Charlie.  From their second album onward they used only pictures of female models for their covers.  The album above started the trend; it was like Charlie was proclaiming to the world, "You think Roxy Music is the king of cheesecake covers? Roxy Music can kiss our lily white British asses!" .

Whatever you may think of cheesecake, whether you approve or disapprove, you have to admit that any album containing the theme from Shaft demands a hot babe on the cover.  Unfortunately, it's followed by a song by Cher, utterly nullifying its mojo.

And finally, I've posted this next one before, but by God it deserves another moment in the limelight.  This is not so much cheesecake as it is mildly disturbing.  I don't really have an answer for what exactly they were going for with this one.  Regardless, it's a beaut.


  1. As a man who buys albums simply for the cover, I'd have to say you have several winners there. The marching band cover is superb.

    I think the "Micky Mouse" gloves are because it's a guitar "factory."

  2. Can I buy the pillow that was used on the Charlie cover?

  3. In today's politically correct environment, the use of women in such sexually exploitive ways has gone out of favor - DAMNIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. Looks like Angie Harmon on Percy Faith cover.

  5. I worked in an easy listening radio station in the mid-70's. I was 15 and working in a radio station. What albums do you think I dug out of the stack first?

  6. The girl on the Charlie cover is actually reading (?) "Howl" by Allen Ginsberg. So I suppose she must be something of an intellectual.

  7. If that accoridan wasn't there, her head would fall off

  8. Is that the same Charlie from the previous album covers collection?

  9. Angela Cartwright graced one


  10. I looked down here and couldn't believe no one had commented on the clearly visible nipple on the Stoneham LP.Was this released in America??? Awesome!

  11. Apropos nothing in particular :-) Harry Stoneham led the house band, and composed the theme, for the iconic Michael Parkinson BBC1 chat shows in the '70s.


  12. Tony Mottola made 5000 guitar-muzak lps in the 60. You could have done a whole page on his cheesecake covers. As has been pointed out, it's easy to identify foreign product by the Nipple Factor.

  13. I'd like to add a picture of Cassandra Peterson (Elvira) to the cheesecake table

    She's 60 and still hot.

  14. Yes, Percy Faith and Ray Conniff had plenty of excellent cheesecake covers but they both had to bow down to the absolute master of the genre - Fausto Papetti, an Italian sax player who not only had scantily clad babes on his cover but often nudity on many of his LPs. I myself own several LPs which I bought mainly for the cover, but sadly none of the fine examples pictured here.

    1. I was gonna mention Fausto Papetti if someone else didn't. I'll never forget that day I was browsing through the cassettes at the library as an 11 or 12-year-old and saw one of his albums... Yowza!

      George Shearing's album "Black Satin" is one of the most beautiful 'cheesecake' covers I own. http://farm1.staticflickr.com/137/345121876_f01358455a_b.jpg

      Ken Griffin has a lot of cheesecake covers too. I have this beauty: http://www.shugarecords.com/images/products/large/6f69de24-0d23-4a68-a9b6-3de38df00a47-0.JPG

  15. all the pictures got sexual appearance

  16. I can't say anything about much of the music here but that Charlie album was great. I have not been able to find it on CD and was reduced to converting the LP to digital so I could listen to it again.

  17. I hope that towels or hankerchiefs were used for the Enoch Light and the Light Brigade cover. I also hope the models sanitized their feet afterward, as there's no telling what was on that floor (and now thanks to this photo shoot, was is on the theater seats).

  18. If you Google "Fausto Papetti album covers" you do get some interesting thing on the image page. I'm surprised I was able to grow up without knowing about him.