9/13/13

Cinema #31: The Top 25 Babes of Sci-Fi Cinema


I figure there's always room for one more list of the top science-fiction babes.  It's got three of my favorite elements: lists, babes, and sci-fi.  Simply put, the list had to be done.  So, here's the rules:
  1. Movies only.  As much as I'd love to include Erin Grey from Buck Rogers or the Barnstable twins from Quark, those will have to wait until the TV edition.
  2. Release date in the 1960s through the 1980s only.  This is Retrospace, after all.  
  3. It has to be unabashedly sci-fi.  You start including WarGames, Supergirl, Ghostbusters and Escape from New York, and it becomes a slippery slope.  Before long you're including Mannequin and Zapped!.  All the films in this list are textbook science fiction (nevertheless, I'm sure someone will ride in on their sci-fi horse of purity and exclude some.)
  4. The film can only be represented one time within the list.  

Sound good?  Before we start, I should also mention that any naughty bits have been censored by The Great Gazoo.  As if you didn't hate him enough, here's even more reason to despise Bedrock's resident alien a-hole.

Enjoy.



1.   JANE FONDA - BARBARELLA (1968)


There's something about the cartoonish and kinky space vixen that has transfixed men for forty plus years. I understand there's a remake in the works; but, my money's on it sucking hard.  You can't recreate Vadim's psychedelic masterpiece, you can only stand in awe of it.

2.  JENNY AGUTTER - LOGAN'S RUN (1976)


You all know I'm a fan of Heather Menzies in the Logan's Run TV show (see these posts).  However, Agutter as Jessica delivers an epic performance.  And by "epic" I don't mean the tired cliche we've all grown to hate.  I mean Legendary, of Homeric proportions, majestic.... something a bard should write poems about and pass them down the generations.  You get my drift.

3.  MATHILDA MAY - LIFEFORCE (1985)


This movie has haunted my dreams since I first saw it on VHS in the eighties.  Mathilda is a space vampire that is naked for the entirety of the film..... and I'm not exaggerating.  I mean, her wardrobe budget was exactly zero dollars and zero cents.  Truly a landmark moment in cinematic nudity.

4.  KELLY LEBROCK - WEIRD SCIENCE (1985)


Thank you Garry and Wyatt for "making a girl... actually making a girl... like Frankenstein... except cuter."

5.  CARRIE FISHER - RETURN OF THE JEDI (1983)


Jabba the Hut wasn't the only one enjoying Leia in a metal bikini.  Youngsters across this great land suffered intense overheating from the sight of it.... only Lando remained cool.

6.  MELODY ANDERSON - FLASH GORDON (1980)


Melody has popped up on Retrospace more than a few times.  Once as the original Victoria's Secret catalog model, and again in a post unto herself.  I love how Flash Gordon gets special props in the film Ted (2012): "Flash Gordon was the most important figure of our formative years. He taught us right from wrong, good from evil. And that the word 'acting' apparently has an extremely broad definition."

7.  CAROLINE MUNRO - STARCRASH (1979)


The lovely Carolyn spends the film wearing what Sean Connery wore in Zardoz.  Maybe I have gender bias, but it looks a lot better on Carolyn.

8.  DOROTHY STRATTEN - GALAXINA (1980)


Yes, this movie was a devastating disappointment, and yes, there's precious little to see of Galaxina.  But it's Dorothy Stratten, so it gets to cut in line.

9.  TRACI LORDS - NOT OF THIS EARTH (1988)


Make no mistake: this is not a good movie.  Even judged from a purely T&A perspective, it still falls short.  But it's Traci Lords big leap to the mainstream from porn, so it deserves some love.  I've never seen the original 1957 Roger Corman film - something tells me they're similar in name only.

10.  FARAH FAWCETT - SATURN 3 (1980)


You've got to understand that Farrah was larger than life in 1980.  Not in a forced-manufactured Lady Gaga kind of way, but in a genuine "Good Lord, Farrah makes me sweat profusely!" kind of way.  To learn that she was topless for even a microsecond was epic news from sea to shining sea.  The movie itself was only so-so, but did it really matter?

11. SYBIL DANNING - BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS (1980)


That's Darlanne Fluegel on the left, but the one we're concerned with is warrior queen, Sybil Danning, whose costumes seem to have a difficult time containing her.  This Roger Corman flick is a blast to watch, possibly due in part to a screenplay by John Sayles (Eight Men Out) and special effects by James Cameron (Titanic, Avatar, Piranha II).... oh, and Sybil's boobs.

12.  CARLA PETERSON - SPACE THING (1968)


They turned the camp factor up to 11 on this one, folks.... but it's beautifully unintentional.  This is low budget sci-fi sexploitation distilled and purified of any pesky talented actors or engaging story.  Not exactly a family friendly film, but if you can appreciate grade Z science fiction with a healthy dose of gratuitous adult content, this is right up your alley.

13.  SIGOURNEY WEAVER - ALIENS (1986)


Yeah, Ripley was better in the first movie IMHO, but I didn't want to include both films in this list.  Anyway, Paul Reiser aside, Aliens is a pretty damn good film in its own right. A personal flashback: I worked in a hospital when this came to theaters, and I remember eavesdropping on the doctors talking about having seen it.  After hearing the rave reviews (albeit vicariously as a pathetic hospital manservant), I simply had to see this film, and was not disappointed.  Sigourney isn't exactly a "space kitten", so her position on this list is a bit lower than you'd expect.

14.  TAAFFE O'CONNELL - GALAXY OF TERROR (1981)


One of the most over-the-top moments in sci-fi cinema history has to be Taaffe O'Connell's rape by a giant amorous space slug.  Taaffe popped up on Retrospace earlier in a Knight Rider post.

Note: This film also stars Joanie from Happy Days.  Thankfully she isn't raped by a space slug - that would've been too much for my fragile psyche to handle.

15.  JOANNA CASSIDY - BLADE RUNNER (1982)


Who expected television mainstay Joanna Cassidy to appear as a topless Replicant?  I liken it to seeing Meredith Baxter-Birney showing up as a naked android in Starship Trooprs (It never happened, but I can dream can't I?)

16.  ROXANNE KERNOHAN - CRITTERS 2 (1988)


Roxanne transforms from a creepy chain-mail clad male alien into a topless chick alien.  Why? Don't ask so many questions.

17.  SANDY BROOKE - STAR SLAMMER (1987)


The women-in-prison Star Wars combo should have been a recipe for success.  Unfortunately, the director didn't give it the ol' Russ Myers try, and instead kept things rather tame and dull.   Still, Sandy Brooke does what she can, and for that, she deserves a place on this hallowed list.

18.  KIM BASSINGER - MY STEPMOTHER IS AN ALIEN (1988)


Family friendly fare featuring Basinger flaunting a fantastic femalien figure.

19.  KENDRA KIRCHNER - ANDROID (1983)


Klaus Kinski is a rabid Teutonic madman.... and I'm not talking about his character - I'm referring to the real life actor.  Thankfully, his cyborg sex slave is there to calm his spirits.  Nicely done, Klaus.

20.  ELLEN BARKIN - ADVENTURES OF BUCKAROO BONZAI (1984)


Barkin's character could have been much more memorable had she gone the sleazy route as she did in, say, Siesta.  Instead, it's a fairly milquetoast role that fills the #20 slot; however, the movie is so damn good, everything is elevated.

21.   GEENA DAVIS - EARTH GIRLS ARE EASY (1988)


Julie Brown wasn't too shabby either; but, I'm only allowing myself one babe per movie.

22. CATHERINE MARY STEWART - NIGHT OF THE COMET (1984)


Kelli Maroney wore the better outfit, but her younger sister (on right) is hotter.  This film is a reminder of what can be done on a shoestring budget with a good idea and plenty of enthusiasm.

23.  MELANIE GRIFFITH - CHERRY 2000 (1987)
A promising title, android sex slaves, and Ms. Griffith - so much potential. (sigh)

24.. KATHY IRELAND - ALIEN FROM L.A. (1988)
So forgettable it may lead to other memory loss as well.  I've not only forgotten this movie, but the entire month afterward has been automatically deposited into my mental recycle bin.

25.  RAQUEL WELCH - FANTASTIC VOYAGE (1966)
Sadly, the filmmakers didn't utilize Raquel's assets; they might as well have hired Shirley Booth to play Cora. What a pity.

40 comments:

  1. For me I simply can't think of Carrie Fischer as a 'babe'(or even really as a girl), even in metal bikini.
    On the other hand Anne Francis is certainly not a 'sex bomb', but her minidresses in Forbidden Planet (1956) were indeed 'futuristic' for the time.

    'Only one babe per movie' unfortunately excludes Anita Pallenberg (Barbarella) -hotter than Jane Fonda imho.

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    1. Anne Francis would have definitely qualified, but the timeline is 1960-1989. Definitely a pioneer in the miniskirt department - Gene Roddenberry obviously took note.

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  2. Logan's Run is on TCM today, as well as Soylent Green. And while I'm thinkin it, why not Leigh Taylor Young here? This is like an "I LOVE THE 80s!!!" post. And while I'm bitchin here, why not more 70s stars? I'm thinking of Caroline Munro, Charlotte Rampling ("Zardoz"), Monika Ringwald ("2069"), and you know the "UFO" babes...
    Welcome back from Salt Lake City, and thanks for bringing back Gazoo the Mormon to censor the bits.

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    1. There's not that much in the way of sci-fi in the 70s that would qualify for this list (not until the Star Wars boom). Caroline Munro is on this list.... and Rampling in Zardoz - not thanks. 2069 maybe should've found it's way here, and UFO was a TV show.

      And, yes, Gazoo was a high ranking member of the Mormon Church until his untimely death at the hands of Bam Bam (little known fact).

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    2. Has anyone ever made the obvious connection re: Bamm Bamm? Abandoned on the Rubbles' doorstep; superhuman strength; clearly, his true father was the Mighty Mightor.

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  3. Space Thing also starred April 1966 Playboy Playmate Karla Conway. She also had a bit part in Fireball 500 along with playmates Jo Collins, and Maria McBane as Leander fans (Fabian). She was 4"11 and later became a successful artist in Hawaii. Nick

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    1. I believe she was the shortest Playmate of the Month ever.

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  4. I would go with Ornella Muti from Flash Gordon, I never thought Dale was very hot.

    Catherine Mary Stuart is coming to a local con that I'm hoping to get to just to meet her. Long time crush!

    You missed a Gazoo on 15 ;-)

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    1. I wasn't sure if it was intentional or not, hehe.

      You could include Gray if you wanted. The pilot was released theatrically before airing on TV. Which would also open the door for Maren Jensen.

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    2. Yup, I remember seeing Buck on a big screen too. Same little small town location I saw A New Hope and so many other great classics. The building is still there but there ain't a projector in it anymore.

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  5. Welcome back ! Linda Harrison - Nova from Planet of the Apes - surely belongs on this list imho.

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    1. Hell yeah! She was SO much hotter than most of the so-so chicks here.

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    2. Agreed. Nova should've been on here.

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  6. I"m nominating Susan Strasberg (psychout), and Luciana Paluzzi (the green slime)

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    Replies
    1. the Green Slime is a damn good suggestion; however, it's been a while since I've seen Psych-Out, and I don't remember it being science fiction.

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  7. Thank you, thank you, thank you for not leaving out Night of the Comet, an oft overlooked gem.

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  8. There's "Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women" from 1968, where a Russian space movie was mashed up with footage of babe-ish young things in seashell bras and hiphuggers led by Mamie Van Doren.

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    1. Holy crap. How have I missed this one all these years? Definitely a damn fine recommendation - I will have to check this one out.

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  9. I think Farrah Fawcett deserves some recognition for Logan's Run here...she was at the very height of her beauty. Sure, she takes her top off in Saturn 3, but her hair was not the massive layer cake that it was in Logan's Run.

    Soylent Green...every time I think of it, I avoid the Taco Bell Menu entirely! :)

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    1. My rule is a film can only be on here once, and I think Agutter should get the nod over Fawcett in Logan's Run... besides, Farrah's represented via Saturn 3.

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  10. What? No Darryl Hannah from Blade Runner? Seriously, you think snake woman was hotter than Pris pummeling & vaulting her way through space fights with garter stockings? Raquel Welsh not being noted for 1 Million Bikinis BC? I'd like to add Zsa Zsa Gabor for Queen of the Universe!

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    1. Hannah gave me the creeps, but I do see your point. 1 Million Years BC didn't seem sci-fi enough - you'll note my rules at the top regarding the "slippery slope". Queen of the Universe (AKA Queen of Outer Space) was 1958 - so it's disqualified by a couple years. Thanks for the feedback though!

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  11. I was going to also suggest that the rules be bent for "One Million Years BC", because of the overwhelming hotness of Raquel Welch. Maybe you can have a list of the top 20 babes of Dinosaur flicks, and just have her take all 20 slots.

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  12. Hope to see an update to Retrospace Zeta now that you are back! Love the one you've had posted at the top for awhile though...

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  13. How about the bad chick on Buck Rogers? She was on Matt Houston and was in the "Doc Savage" movie? I keep thinking of Pamela Hensley for some reason.
    Oh what was her name?!? Anyway she was always very hot to me.-Derek

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    1. It was Pamela, and I agree with you. Figure-wise, she was certainly 'put together' a little better than Erin Grey. But I thought she always looked sexier on 'Matt Houston', although she wore more clothes. On 'Buck Rogers', she had to walk around looking mean and ticked off!

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  14. My nominations:

    Barbara Bach in "The Humanoid", an Italian knock-off copy of Star Wars starring Richard Kiel.

    Judy Geeson in "Inseminoid" which, by 1980, shouldn't have bothered trying to recreate the look of a late 50's sci fi movie.

    Maud Adams in "Rollerball". OK, so she wanders around in chunky sweaters and flares but she's your classy, thinking man's eye candy.

    Virginia Madsen in "Dune".

    Olivia Newton-John in "Toomorrow". One of these days I'm going to make it to the end of that movie.

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  15. Great list and spot on! Caroline Munro was also one of the infamous "Hammer girls" in the 60s and 70s, appearing in many of the Hammer sexy horror movies.
    And by the way is still damn fine looking today.
    http://www.carolinemunro.org/

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  16. Catherine von Schell in "Moon Zero Two"...or if you prefer MILFs, Adrienne Corry in the same movie.

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  17. "...ride in on their sci-fi horse of purity and exclude some..."

    I'm gonna use a variation of that sometime.
    Don't know when.
    Don't know where.
    I'll credit you with authorship.

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  18. Gabrielle Drake from the early 1970's Gerry Anderson TV show "UFO". I'll never forget that purple wig and amazing body (she is also musician Nick Drake's sister btw)

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    1. Yes! Gabrielle was an absolute doll on that show. If you ever want to see her in the, um, 'all together', look for the British comedy film, 'The Au Pair Girls'.

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  19. Jane Fonda? Sorry. Just knowing of her so-called 'political activism' is too much of a turn-off for me. But there's no denying her physical beauty in 'Barbarella'. Honorable mention should be given to:

    Natasha Henstridge (Species)
    Barbara Shelley (5 Millions Years to Earth)
    And the late Persis Khambatta, as Lt. Ilia in 'Star Trek: The Motion Picture'. Yeah, she was bald, but she was still hot.

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  20. Love this list! But you missed one that I've always, ALWAYS had a super duper nerd crush on. Linda Hamilton - Terminator (1984). Nuff said. Runner up (and this is not super vintage I know) but Madeleine Stowe - 12 Monkeys (1995). Had the chance to ring her up at Amoeba in Hollywood Spring 2012, and she is still stunning and very, very charming and sweet. The crush continues!

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  21. Sorry I'm late to the conversation... but I'd like to put my 2 credits in for Persis Khambatta in Star Trek: The Motion Picture.

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  22. Milla Jovovich! Fifth Element! She was going to be my wife after I saw that movie. Alas, she never knew it.

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  23. Minor point of order:

    In "Night of the Comet, Catherine Mary Stewart was the older sister not the younger one.

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  24. If you do a Sci Fi TV version, Christina Hendricks better be near the top of the list for her recurring role on Firefly!

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  25. Mike PuckettNovember 08, 2013

    Uhh...I know it is more of a TV pilot that was shown on the Big Screen but Erin Grey as Wilma Dering and Pamela Hensley as Princess Ardala in Buck Rogers int eh 25th Century certainly are both more worthy than Carrie Fisher.

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