Get ready for a comprehensive guide to every miniskirt in the last two seasons of The Brady Bunch. Minis and the Bradys are the backbone of Retrospace, and it's high time they united. Future generations will thank me for the scope work I've done in Miniskirtology (it's not a scientific field of study yet; but, in the future it will be).
Anyway, this post will cover the first half of season four. Enjoy!
S04E03 "The Tiki Caves"
The third part to the infamous Hawaii episodes. Not many minis to be found in episodes 1-3, except this scene where the girls debate about whether to tell mom and dad about the boys' disappearance to Vincent Price's cave.
S0404 "Today, I Am a Freshman"
The volcano episode. I go into this one in detail in another post. Read it here.
S04E05 "Cyrano de Brady"
Peter falls for Jan's friend, Gretl from The Sound of Music. Unfortunately, she develops a crush on Johnny Bravo instead.
Peter lathers on the Hai Karate and gets all dapper to win his lady's favor. He secretly enlists Greg's help to woo her with a romantic speech beneath her window (hence the episode's title). To no avail - it's Greg she loves.
Greg and Marcia concoct an insane plan to demonstrate that Greg is really a two-timing douche bag. Miraculously, it works and Pete gets the girl. A happy ending is had by all.
S04E06 "Fright Night"
In this scene, the Brady girls figure out how the boys spooked them. They pledge to get back at them, resulting in Mrs. Brady's odd sculpture getting smashed. One of my favorite episodes.
S04E07 "The Show Must Go On??"
Marcia has promised the Entertainment Committee that she'd provide acts for the Family Night Frolics, and so must enlist the help of mom and dad. As expected, the Bradys steal the show and make the audience their bitch.
It takes a little convincing to get Mike and Carol on stage, but Mike's a diva at heart and is only to ready to glam it up.
The non-Brady miniskirt courtesy a terrible father-daughter brass section, which only makes the Brady's act that much more of a crowd-pleaser.
S04E08 "Jan, the Only Child"
Not a good episode for minis. A quick second when the Bradys return from their hoedown is all.
S04E09 "Career Fever" - 0 minis
S04E10 "Goodbye, Alice, Hello"
The kids give Alice the cold shoulder when they learn she snitched on them to their parents. Alice says, "F**k these losers, I'm outta here" and becomes a waitress.
The next day, they meet Alice's replacement who happens to be a grumpy old bitch.
The kids discuss the switch in live-in maids, and we learn how quickly the Brady children will turn on you and show no mercy.
Eventually the spoiled Brady kids come around (if only for selfish reasons) and go to the sleazy diner where Alice works to beg her to come back.
S04E11 "Greg's Triangle"
An epic episode for miniskirts. This is the one where Greg must choose between his sister and his new fling, Jennifer Nichols (Tannis G. Montgomery) as a judge in the cheerleader tryouts.
In the scene above, Nichols strategically bumps into Greg in an attempt to win his affection as a judge in the tryouts. You may recognize Nichole's wardrobe because they're the same outfits Marcia wore in the famous Davy Jones episode. (S03E12).
If you ever doubt that the director was conscious of the nice scenery the miniskirts provided, you need to watch this scene. Greg and the camera leer at Jennifer's backside as she walks away. A lecherous moment, but I can dig it.
Greg invites Jennifer over to meet the parents and go on a date. Greg is smitten.
The next day, Jennifer further embeds herself in Greg's good graces. She twirls around in her miniskirt to show Greg the outfit she'll wear to the tryouts. Marcia sees this maneuver and starts to worry about Greg's impartiality as a judge.
Marcia calls him out on it. But Greg insists he's still impartial.... despite the fact that he's still staring unblinkingly at her ass. You'll also notice that Marcia wore this same minidress in the previous episode.
Marcia confides to Jan of her concerns regarding the cheerleader tryouts. Jan pretends to give a shit.
The tryouts begin. First, we get to watch Tom Hanks' future wife (Rita Wilson) do her routine. Marcia and Jennifer look on nervously.
It's judgment time, and Greg ends up being the tie breaking vote. Who will he choose: the girl he lusts after, or his own sister? Spoiler alert: Neither. He picks Tom Hanks' wife.
Back at the Brady residence, Marcia tells Greg that she respects his decision. Personally, I think she's just happy he didn't choose that little tramp, Jennifer.
Stay tuned for Part Two.