At last, we have reached the final installment of the I Dream of Jeannie Miniskirt Monday series. Enjoy!
"Jeannie and the Curious Kid" - Season 5, Episode 19
|Amanda Bellows in a pink and white striped mini dress|
And thus the stage is set for 20+ minutes of comedy gold. Naturally, the boy is going to see genie magic, and they're going to have to scramble to hide the truth. One of my favorite IDOJ quotes comes from Dr. Bellows when little Melvin claims he's seen a real life genie:
"It's those comic books. He reads so many of them, they've affected his brain."
Jeannie arrives out of her genie outfit, and pretending to have just come home with groceries. Everything's so perfectly normal - of course, it's okay for little Melvin to stay! What could go wrong?
Dear God, Major Nelson lived the life. This is how he reads the paper - with a foxy genie hovering around him waiting on his every desire.
Another great quote comes from Tony when Jeannie says little Melvin is a nice little boy:
"Oh, he's a nice a little boy alright. He's also suspicious, curious, creepy and a threat to my existence."
A great description of kids from The Master.
Among the great things about Jeannie's micro-minis are their tendency to hike even father upwards with the slightest movement. It certainly adds to the enjoyment of the viewing experience.
The rest of the story involves Melvin capturing Jeannie in the bottle, and Tony and Roger having to break into the Bellows' residence to retrieve her. As nice as her genie outfit is, this is a Miniskirt Monday, so it doesn't concern us. Move along - there's nothing to see here.
"Jeannie, the Recording Secretary" - Season 5, Episode 20
Jeannie is attending her first meeting of the Officers' Wives Club but discovers she's wearing the exact same dress as one of the other members.
To save her the embarrassment, she blinks into a pink miniskirt. Tony disapproves, so she changes back... but puts the pink dress on her unwitting Officers' Wives Club colleague. (Note that her colleague is much older, and the minidress has thankfully become fitted below the knee).
Anyway, Jeannie gets elected as the club's recording secretary.
Later, Jeannie enjoys an old fashioned TV dinner while reading a magazine. while her master is on a mission out of earth's orbit which requires him to take a sleeping pill (this will be important later).
The doorbell rings...
Nothing wrong with a little Jeannie upskirt now and again to keep the dads in the audience interested.
Her fellow club members are paying a surprise visit to judge for the best husband contest. So, Jeannie blinks Major Nelson back home; unfortunately, she can't blink him out of his sleepy stupor.
Jeannie blinks Tony to slump over the kitchen sink, giving the impression that he's slaved over the dishes to the point of exhaustion. Score one for husband of the year.
Unfortunately, this is the last we see of Jeannie's micro-mini; she's wearing pants in the next scene.
The wives club arrives to judge Tony the next day. Since Tony can't be awakened, Jeannie has turned her master into an automaton, a robotic "perfect husband" which she controls with her mind. Kind of creepy.
Thankfully, one of the wives club members is wearing a short dress - keeping the mini flame burning while Jeannie wears pants.
Tony, being a mindless automaton, is exceedingly clumsy, wrapping the ladies in yarn and knocking over their chairs. While this is extremely distressing behavior, as usual on IDOJ, the witnesses take it in stride, shrugging off behavior that would cause great alarm in real life.
The wives club has arrived to announce that Tony has been selected as the best husband. Jeannie blinks her master back to the living room to receive the award, but Amanda Bellows arrives....
Amanda knows Major Nelson should be in space right now. So, the hijinks unfold until the end of the episode, where, as always, weak explanations are offered which are reluctantly accepted, but in the end everyone's happy.
"Help, Help, a Shark" - Season 5, Episode 21
Sadly, no minis in this episode. Jeannie wears a green velour jumpsuit the whole episode. She's rolling around, hiding, crouching, etc. in a pool room the whole episode, which would have made for some great miniskirt watching. Alas, it's just a jumpsuit, so we'll move on to the next episode...
"Eternally Yours, Jeannie" - Season 5, Episode 22
Jeannie is jealous of Tony's high school sweetheart, Bonnie. So, she transforms herself to look like her to put her master to the test.
Naturally, Roger is quick to hit on her with a vengeance. The dude was such a player.
Tony is wise to Jeannie's game. To teach her a lesson, he hits on her even stronger than Roger.
To complicate things, this is the real Bonnie. You see, Bonnie has come to visit Tony since she'll be in the neighborhood - her husband, Moose, is doing some electrical work for NASA.
So, just to be clear: there's a Jeannie Bonnie and a Real Bonnie. Roger is unwittingly hitting on the Jeannie Bonnie, and Tony is unwittingly hitting on the Real Bonnie. Let's proceed.
Moose catches Roger coming-on to who he thinks is his wife. So, in an act of unexpected violence, he knocks out both Roger and Jeannie Bonnie. Moose clearly has anger issues.
Moose picks up the unconscious Jeannie Bonnie and carries her off over his shoulder. Canned laughter resounds - isn't domestic violence hilarious?
Moose carries Jeannie Bonnie to a couch and gets her some water to revive her. But, while his back is turned, she revives, blinks back into being Jeannie, and leaves. Moose wonders where the hell his wife went.
Meanwhile, Tony has drug Real Bonnie home. She thinks she's being abducted, and Tony thinks he's teaching Jeannie a lesson.
Note that Bonnie is played by actress Damian Bodie. Strangely, this is the one and only acting role for Bodie. It's always baffling when a stunning beauty appears onscreen, then is never heard of again.
Damian, are you out there?
As always, things are wrapped up nicely. Moose finds the Real Bonnie, and confronts her abductor. Jeannie saves the day and realizes her master really loves her. Jeannie and Tony are happy again, while Bonnie and Moose evacuate, forever scarred from the experience.
"An Astronaut in Sheep's Clothing" - Season 5, Episode 23
Not one of the better episodes - for comedy or miniskirts. Jeannie wants to make her master a cashmere sweater, so rather than buying one, she gets an actual goat. A pretty tired concept, which isn't helped by the fact that Jeannie is in a pair of brown pants most of the episode. Thankfully, she appears briefly in a plaid miniskirt (above) and a short powder blue mini - but only for a few seconds of screen time.
"Hurricane Jeannie" - Season 5, Episode 24
An important episode - this is where Bellows finally learns the truth about Jeannie. I suppose they knew the show was coming to an end, and felt this was necessary. This episode is 100% miniskirt free, so we won't linger.
"One Jeannie Beats Four of a Kind" - Season 5, Episode 25
Major Nelson is hosting a poker game, and Jeannie must leave and go to the movies - no womenfolk allowed.
Of course, Jeannie ensures her master is the big winner - which doesn't exactly please his superiors, such as General Schaefer.
The fact that Jeannie is bringing expensive items to Tony's work under the watchful eye of the general and Dr. Bellows doesn't help either. Their convinced he's a card shark.
Things get progressively more and more out of hand, even involving a mob boss; however, there's a woeful lack of minis, so we'll move on to the final episode.
"My Master, the Chili King" - Season 5, Episode 26
It was intended to be the final episode. Regardless, the show gives us a nice parting gift via one of the best minis of the show's run.
Major Nelson has an unexpected guest, his cousin Arvel from Texas. Arvel thinks the Nelson's are loaded, and cons Jeannie into venturing into the chili business. With the a sizeable Nelson financial investment, and Arvel's secret recipe, they're bound to become rich.
Jeannie is at the grocery store, and look who's the grocer - Dick Van Patten. Unfortunately, this black miniskirt gets precious little exposure.
The situation in this episode revolves around Amanda Bellows getting wise to "Cousin Tony's Chili". NASA astronauts are not allowed to promote products or engage in commercial enterprises. Sadly, not a lot of miniskirt sightings throughout.
And this is how the series ended - with Tony eating a bowl of chili. A classic sitcom ends ingloriously. It's fitting that Jeannie wears a miniskirt in the show's final scene; however, it's painfully obscured from view.
Anyway, it's been fun miniskirt watching IDOJ's final season. I hope you've enjoyed it as well. Next up - Batman!