Opinions and Rants #45: Is It Any Wonder?
It's been a couple years; we're long overdue for another rant. This is basically a reflection on why certain things have gone south today. Not an empirical, historical look, but rather a ranting, tubthumping look... but no less valid, in my view.
Grab, a beer, pull up a chair, and have a listen to a good old fashioned, 'what's wrong with this world' speech....
With the nuclear family dismantled, is it any wonder we've lost our way?
I mean, friends and social media (and sites like this!) are great - but a cohesive family is perhaps most important of all. In the wake of the 1970s, divorce became the new normal, and "family time" became an antiquated concept in most homes.
The thing is, your family is where you get your identity, your support, your values.... when it's gone, friends, social media, and popular culture fills the void, and that's often not a good thing. In Western Europe where they're not even having enough kids to replace the population, the families are gradually shrinking into nothingness.
Don't get me wrong - some families suck. Some families do more harm than good. But it's okay to talk in generalities... in fact, you have to talk in generalities in issues like this; getting hung up on the "not all" principle and focusing on exceptions does nothing but derail the conversation.
So, in general terms, the dissolution of the family unit has not been a good thing. Its vacuum has subsequently been filled by unhealthy shallow replacements... or it's not been filled at all, leaving very empty inner-lives.
With gender norms dismantled, is it any wonder there's gender confusion?
Let me say this right off the bat: I support equal rights for gays, I am of the belief that homosexuality, as a general rule, is genetic (with, perhaps, external stimuli which can favor a pathway). I have absolutely zero issues with the gay population. Life is too short for me to worry about someone else's sexual proclivities. Not my business.
I'm talking about the gender confused, the significant portion of our population who doesn't know what the f**k they are. Worse, men are emasculated, women are victims, and men and women are triggered into rabid seizures over gender specific pronouns... what the hell has happened?
The fact is we are biologically different. To deny this is as blind as denying the earth is round. But you know what? - it's okay. It really is.
In fact, it's actually kind of nice that men and women are different. We each bring something special and unique to the table. Best of all, when you're okay with being a male, or you're okay with being a female, there's a certain self-satisfaction, a certain contentedness, that comes with it.
And this leads into my next rant...
When all men are painted as semi-retarded pricks, is it any wonder a healthy, solid relationship is hard to come by these days?
If you take a moment to listen to what's coming out of universities these days, and rapidly washing over the unmatriculated masses, you'll notice that the clarion call is: all men are sexist douchebag rapists. Women need to rise above these subhuman motherf***ers and bring in a new wave of enlightenment, free from their testosterone-corrupted ways.
Here's the problem - let's assume they're right: all men are moronic pigs - where does that leave us as a species? Is this mentality a recipe for strong happy relationships, or a recipe for conflict and lifelong angst?
When women are "the oppressed" and men "the oppressors", is it any wonder human sexuality just isn't fun anymore?
Amid this hostile culture, men are pressured to emasculate themselves and become self-hating wimps. Again - not exactly a recipe for happy relationships. When the relationship between males and females is boiled down to "oppressors" and "the oppressed", can you see that we've kind of boiled out the fun? Maybe lightening up a little and just enjoying being a guy, and being a girl would do wonders.
My message to the fellas - it's freaking okay to be a guy. Even a gay guy. It really is okay. No one is going to die when you announce that you are a happy, content, and well adjusted guy. Sure, some radical feminists may emit shrill cries and tell you you're a bastard... but it really will be fine.
And, who knows? Maybe you may meet some hot babe who's just as content being a girl as you are a guy. Stranger things have happened.
When we think promiscuity is always okay, is it any wonder guys have learned they get the milk for free?
In the 1970s, western society experimented with sexual freedom in a way that more-or-less erased the taboo of frequent, indiscriminate sex. But - and this is a big BUT - they were not stupid and naive enough to believe this was in any way a step toward long term relationships. Whether it was key parties or hot tub orgies, there wasn't a delusion that this was the path toward marriage or stable relationships. That is what they were rebelling against - they were casting aside traditional relationships, not looking for them!
Somehow, in 2016, people think f***ing is step one on a path towards a traditional relationship, something meaningful. [Sure, sometimes it is, but, again, you have to talk in generalities when dealing with issues; getting hung up on exceptions and the "not always" fallacy will kill discussions straight away.] Without the goal of sex, you've removed one of the motivations to pursue the often difficult path towards a monogamous long term relationship. This is common sense: you've removed a reward, erased an incentive... is it any wonder long term relationships are hard to come by these days?
Now, I'm not saying we all need to be virgins on our honeymoon. Have all the sex you want - I don't care. But just don't be stupid enough to believe that sex is Step A on a path towards a relationship. If sex is your Step A, you will never get to Step B.
When spirituality is dead, is it any wonder we've settled into shallow, empty materialism?
Look, no one hates preachy judgemental assholes more than me. Don't you dare tell me what I should and should not believe. If I want to be a goddamn atheist - then, who are you to tell me I can't? Who are you to tell me I'm wrong and judge me? F**k off.
But here's the rub: If I want to be a goddamn Catholic - then, who are you to tell me I can't? Who are you to tell me I'm wrong and judge me? F**k off.
We've created a culture (Europe in particular) where believing in a higher power is seen as backward and laughable.... in other words, it's judged, it's condescended to. And heaven forbid, I choose to believe in a higher power AND choose to connect with that higher power within a group - that's, that's,... that's (gulp) organized religion! (shudder)
Face reality, folks. If you're not going to be a part of an organized religion or believe in a deity, then at least realize that emptiness needs to be filled with something meaningful. All the sex and X-Box games in the world aren't going to fill that void over the long haul.
I'm not going to go into an argument for or against the existence of God. In fact, let's presume, Nietzsche was absolutely correct - there's nothing beyond the material world. The answer is not, then, to believe in nothing... you'll become Camu's Stranger, Dostoevsky's Raskolnikov. It's a sad, tiresome, useless existence. You'll follow your primal urges for gratification, but in the end, life's a bore.
You can pat yourself on the back for your 'enlightenment', but unless you find something existentially important to believe in, you'll be empty,, angry, and lack conviction or inner-peace.
Oh, and by the way, believing in your own enlightenment, and the inferiority of Christians, doesn't count as existentially important.
With all these hang-ups is it any wonder we're losing our mojo?
I'll end with this (although, I have much more to say, so stay tuned for part two).
When we're so sensitive that we're triggered into sanctimonious rages over offensive language or oppositional perspectives, life is going to be nothing but a giant gut wrenching stress ball. Chill the f**ck out.
When guys and girls are bullied into gender mis-identities against their natural condition, it's going to lead to confusion and lifelong relationship trainwrecks. Be a guy, be a girl and move on, goddammit.
When women expect a blow job to be the start of something lasting, they're going to be in for a rude awakening. How about, if your endgame is a long term relationship, try not f***ing when you first meet? Just try it once.
Get some meaning to your empty, shitty life - whether that be religion or medicine or nature. And don't judge what other people choose. Get over yourself - you're not special.
And last but not least, ENJOY YOUR LIFE. Social Justice Warriors, put down your self-righteous signs and buckets of fake period blood, and pick up a nice cold Budweiser or a glass of Scotch. Take a deep breath, grab a girl or guy, and have some fun. Life ain't so bad. And, yes, maybe people are acting stupid or insensitive around you.... but that's the beauty of humanity - we all make mistakes, we all act stupid and insensitive from time to time, and we're all doing the best we can.