Cinema #23: Killer Lobby Cards (Part 6)

This rated PG sequel to The Land that Time Forgot is pure cinematic cheese; don't come looking for a Merchant-Ivory production here. As much as I like to see E. M. Forester's literature translated for the big screen, I can't help but prefer lighthearted 1970s schlock. This movie delivers, if for no other reason than cavegirl Dana Gillespie's wardrobe.

Super Stooges vs. The Wonder Women (1975)

This movie is currently available via Netflix under the title Rarescope: Amazons and Supermen (which is utterly ridiculous).  I haven't seen it, but you can bet it's in the ole queue. If you're a sucker for the "so bad it's good" movie as I am, this would seem to be right up our alley.  I'm expecting a combination of bitter disappointment and sublime enjoyment.

Raquel Welch in Kansas City Bomber (1972)

Roller skating and, in particular roller derby, became big in the seventies; but not so much in '72.  This movie actually arrived before the big rollermania phenomenon, and so it is more a docudrama of a dying sport than it is a glamorization of a current fad.  It sort of resembles Paul Newman's Slapshot, where the sport's gritty underbelly is the focus rather than the grand spectacle, as is done in oh so many sports movies.

This movie had everything going for it: a soundtrack by disco queen Donna Summer, Jaqueline Bissette, and, most importantly, the Peter Benchley name attached.  Next to Star Wars, Jaws was the biggest thing to hit theaters that decade, this could've easily glommed on to that gravy train. Instead, The Deep is one of the most boooooooring films ever.... and that's counting my uncle's 8mm vacation films.

Motel Hell (1980) is one of those rare movies that can combine lighthearted fun with immensely gory horror themes.  Slither, starring Nathan Fillion, did it nicely, as did Return of the Living Dead and Re-Animator.  But this one has the edge over them all - Wolfman Jack.

Arabella (1967) is your average Italian romp - not much to say about it other than 'holy crap James Fox has been in a lot of movies'. He's Veruca Salt's dad in Tim Burton's Willie Wonka remake, the doctor in The Walking Dead, and he's even in the crappy Robby Downy Jr. Sherlock Holmes movie. The guy gets around.

The Mummy's Shroud (1967) is particularly good Hammer horror film, despite not having Cushing or Lee. It's a fast paced monster movie, not pretentious or overly wordy. Two crusty mummified thumbs up.


  1. Motel Hell is a fantastic movie. I'll never look at a pig's head the same way. And it really does take all kinds of critters to make Farmer Vincent's fritters.

  2. I appreciate Dana Gillespie's knockers. (Not a witty riposte, perhaps, but sometimes the blank truth is all there is.)

  3. I've not seen a single one of these movies! I'm sure the needs correcting immediately.

  4. Speaking of, I would like to hear your take on the big Roller Derby phenomenon during the seventies, why it was so big then and stuff. I'm curious :)

    1. There's also a actual documentary from around that time called DERBY, about a young man and his efforts of joining the Roller Derby--I have a TV commercial for it in my video collection. And KANSAS CITY BOMBER was respectable enough to earn Raquel Welch an Oscar nomination.

  5. I think I know why that Super Stooges movie title got changed. People were probably going to that movie looking for the new Three Stooges or something. I did actually see Kansas City Bomber though.

  6. Excellent stuff! Especially love that last one.

  7. Have to disagree on your "The Deep" comments, having read the book and seen the movie [in '77 I believe?] -- I thought they were both quite good. (And the first five or ten minutes with Jackie in that Tee was well worth the admission price for ANY Teenage male in the Seventies or today I Should think)



  8. In that first one...can someone Photoshop a picture of the Middle Class in there? Sorry, not usually political, maybe the 2 people there are already what the middle class look like.

    Great cards. And yes the Deep is dull except for the first few minutes of T covered bewbs. Could someone dig up the backstory on The Deep and JB and her thoughts on that flic?