Vintage Reads #40: Trashy Paperbacks

God knows I've posted my share of trashy paperbacks.  To be fare, though, there are dozens of blogs solely dedicated to the subject.  So, you might say I'm actually pretty sparse with the dirty books.  Plus, these paperbacks aren't just literary detritus unworthy of our time; they're cultural artifacts.  Take for instance the cover above - the counterculture was the subject of many a lurid novel. Just as Paris had been the fantasyland for the male minds of the fifties, the hippie movement also provided lustful appeal to older gents of the sixties.  Both Paris and Haight-Ashbury provided male readers an exotic place without inhibition.  Who wouldn't want to go there?

"A Scuba-diving Stud" - the unauthorized biography of a young Cousteau, perhaps?  For extra points can you count the number of grammatical errors in that tag line?  Of course, I shouldn't talk - my mother has a master's degree in English and would fill every one of my posts with red ink if given the chance.  Lots of superfluous commas, lots of dashes, and plenty of dot-dot-dot action... Diagram the sentences of Retrospace posts at your own peril.

I can't decide if that's Richard Dawson or George Lazenby.  Also, I'm sad to report that a good number of these paperbacks have an ill placed price tag on the cover.  I guess the seller never dreamed these would be scanned and posted for hundreds of thousands to see.

From Wikipedia: The Way of a Man with a Maid is an anonymous, sadomasochistic, erotic novel, probably first published in 1908. The story is told in the first person by a gentleman called "Jack", who lures women he knows into a kind of erotic torture chamber, called "The Snuggery", in his house, and takes considerable pride in meticulously planned rapes which he describes in minute detail.

I wouldn't hold your breath for a Pixar adaptation any time soon.  I'm a bit curious how this is the sequel yet it's also called 'book three'.

My Nightly Ritual:

Have a bowl of cereal.  Post something on Retrospace.  Watch TV with the wife, maybe Game of Thrones or Mad Men.  Go to bed and read stuff on phone (Reddit, Google Reader, Tumblr) for about thirty minutes. Sleep.

Somehow I don't think my nightly ritual is the same caliber as the one Helen Swanson wrote about.  I could be wrong.

Why does this title sound so awful? "Lust in the Desert" would be fine, and so would "Lust Gallops In".  What the hell?

I'm currently fully addicted to Lego Batman 2 and would consider myself quite the stud champ.  Once again, probably not of the caliber described in this book.

One of my favorite titles ever - for obvious reasons.  Other faves: Jambalaya Loverman, The Cruel Cocks,  Amorous Dietitian, and (drum roll, please) The Masturbators; tagline "I can't stop and I don't want to".

Obviously a twist on Fanny Hill, the most prosecuted and banned book in history.  Freddy is a Modern Man..... of Pleasure. (Is that last little bit really necessary?)  Interestingly enough, the same author, Catling, wrote the beloved children's book The Chocolate Touch.

Written by Philip Phillips - really? The author's name is as redundant as the tag lines.  And how exactly does one pluck a woman?

Awful.  I take everything I said in the opening paragraph back about these being culturally valuable.  Philip Phillips ruined it for me.

"Watch out boy. She'll chew you up."


  1. A Scuba-Diving Stud who gets paid for it...nice work if you can get it--and it you get it, won't you tell ME how?

  2. The full title was actually "Lust Gallops into the Desert on a Black Horse Ridden by a Man Riding It into the Desert While Galloping". Be happy that Lynton's editor shortened it.

  3. "I can't decide if that's Richard Dawson or George Lazenby." I'm totally thinking Peter Lawford.

  4. "The haunted gay": There is something very, very wrong with the depicted woman's body. Her left tit is probably living a life of it's own, for example.

  5. Seems like a better twist on Fanny Hill would be Fanny Vale.

  6. Wild & Wanton

    In my life, it's more like Wild Wonton, lunch as the asian food place with the really spicy sause on the table.

  7. " And how exactly does one pluck a woman?"

    Gilligan, you would be so much more popular if you had the answer to THAT question.
    Ever hear of a "Venus Butterfly."

  8. You gotta love the Cyberman in drag who opens this entry.