Pulp Pages #3

Are you ready for another round?  You thought the last post was scraping the bottom of the barrel - well. I've got news for you:  there's still plenty of dregs left.  These are stories from romance and crime magazines primarily from the 1970's.  Enjoy the gallery, and I highly recommend you take a long shower when you're done.

Wait, you shrieked this announcement? That doesn't sound playful, that sounds frightening.

PSST! There's no such thing as a sex detective.  He's just a pervert.

Nothing snarky to say here.  Let's move along....

Yes, but is he still 'master of his domain'? Something tells me he didn't take a vacation as much as he just took long showers.

Kinky mom, hot daughter.  This isn't a cautionary tale, it's every guy's fantasy.

Those damn homosexuals, always wanting jobs and to make a living wage.  It's a scandal!

My advice to the aspiring beatnik:  Get a job.

Somebody give Love Monster a comb.

When "Harlot of the Highways" isn't sensational enough, you can always add the ole' reliable "nude corpse" bit for that extra umph

Is this a brochure on Mormonism?

Rafi's the brains and spark plug, and his gal is the human shield.

So murder's gone, then? Good.  This should be a peaceful happy story.

Yep.  She should have had her hands in the "10 and 2" position.  Let that be a lesson to you young drivers out there.

What the Bush family doesn't want you to know.

Spoiler Alert:  Yes.

"....so I killed a witch instead.  It seemed like the logical thing to do."

Why you trippin? Yo, suckas be needing a good fleece.

Make love not war.  Unless it's this kind of war, in which case sign me up -I enlist.

....and I also ate the last thin mint in the fridge without asking, and I smoked half a menthol cigarette, and I said the F word at camp once.

Susan, I think this game is rigged, and all the guys are in on it.  In their defense, no one wants to see Bill and Gordon  with their shirts off.

The Story of Rizzo

He was actually raised in a brothel by his stepmother.... and his name's not Don Draper, it's Dick Whitman.

....and then I realized it didn't really matter what he thought of me.  I am my own person.  I am woman - hear me roar.
- the Birth of Women's Lib

Guys named Mac typically aren't guys to play with.  Percy, Sheldon, Norman, Waldo are fine,.... but not Mac.  Never Mac.

"Meow Manor"?  Really?  I am at a loss...

God says you've got till next Tuesday.

Gross.  Just gross.

Warning: Sufferers of 'never nude syndrome' should not attempt.  Sorry, Tobias.

The mystery woman this couple regularly invites into their bed is actually named "Zza Zza".  

"You are going to date that nice black boy, Jamarcus, and you'r going to like it!"



  1. AnonymousJune 23, 2013

    Wait a minute. What is the sex secret Johnny Cash and Kirk Douglas share? Inquiring minds want to know. Does it have something to do with leather?

  2. AnonymousJune 23, 2013

    "vacation from sex" AKA herpes flare up.

  3. "...and if that don't fetch 'em, I don't know Arkansaw."
    --the Duke of Bilgewater

  4. Mixed Up Mistress Of Meow Manner sounds better than The Pulverized Proprietor of Pussy Palace.

  5. AnonymousJune 23, 2013

    Say, isn't that Sloane from Ferris Bueller's Day Off in Photo #3: "Pssst There's a Sex Detective Following Me!" ?
    She's fallen on some "hard" times...LOL

  6. AnonymousJuly 12, 2013

    No such thing as a Sex Detective? Well, then my hard-earned money was wasted on my Sex Detective home study course.